Posts tagged tell your story
In My Opinion, Where Do We Go From Here?

Over the last ten years I’ve been pulling back the curtain on the strange and ongoing train wreck of treatment options for compulsive-abusive sexual relationship disordered men and their wives and families. In my opinion there is no evidence-based publishable research available to back up what was being marketed (I searched and searched and am still searching after ten years.) Religious-based versions soon sprang up around it and are now closely allied to it. “Believers” already enrolled in faith-based organizations may be seamlessly transferred into affiliated treatment programs that are easily shrink-wrapped in the religious propositions of the day. Once there, the theories and methods go unchallenged by women who are desperate, traumatized and already conforming to their religious community’s direction and authority.

As long as the compulsive-abusive sexual relational disordered man is reinstated as some version of the spiritual and authoritative head of the household, success is declared. The women and children are there to do what they are told. Meanwhile his true core values that actually run the show are never named or unseated. And in describing that situation I am reminded of a New Testament professor from seminary days (now in Glory) who used to say in his thick Irish accent “Onward Christian soldiers, marching as to war, with the cross of Jesus…vaguely in our minds.”

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therapeutic abuse, self-careDiane Stricklandtelling the truth of your life, tell your story, sex addicts are abusers, reality check, recovery ploys
Intimate Partner Abuse: How Does It Impact You?

Intimate Partner Abuse by men called sex addicts is a taboo topic for the treatment industry and religious-based recovery programs and practitioners. Your response to last week’s blog, however, tells me it’s a topic long overdue for attention. Thank you for your feedback and additional items for the list.

Today I’m talking about the impact and consequences from the abuse we have endured. It’s not a pretty list, either, so please take care of yourself as you read it. Pace yourself. Use mindfulness coping strategies, tapping, and self-soothing strategies along the way. And if your symptoms need urgent attention seek professional help or call a crisis helpline for women.

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Post-traumatic stress, self-careDiane Stricklandpartners are priority, wives and partners pay the price, bearing witness, patriarchal assumptions, telling the truth of your life, tell your story, therapeutic incompetence, intimate partner abuse, intimate partner violence
Mid-week Gotta Share from PoSARC

Lili Bee and her team at www.posarc.com have launched their second video set in their “Survivors” series. It features Tania Rochelle talking about her journey out of darkness into the light of new day in her life—where hope, joy, meaningful work, laughter and love all thrive in a life where she is safe from domestic violence endured from her compulsive-abusive sexual-relational disordered man. You can view Parts 1 & 2 here: http://www.posarc.com/blog Lili Bee writes an introduction and then if you scroll down you can see the videos there. Enjoy!

And here’s the link to the “Starting Over” post that Tania guest-blogged here on her new life, in case you haven’t read that one yet: https://www.yourstoryissafehere.com/blog/startingover

THANK YOU LILI BEE AND THE POSARC TEAM FOR THESE GREAT VIDEOS. THANK YOU TANIA, FOR OPENING UP YOUR LIFE TO SO MANY WOMEN!

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Diane Stricklandhope, survivor video, your strength, tell your story, telling the truth of your life, telling the truth about him, partners look after themselves, partners who challenge sex addicts
Trying To Do The Right Thing

We are women of integrity and caring. We think about the wellbeing of others, even when those others have hurt us. Our high level core values are real. They inspire us, guide us and constrain us. We may rant and cry and swear about the cruelty visited upon us by the person we loved and their treatment gang, but when push comes to shove it’s very hard for us to make a decision without asking “What is the right thing to do here?”

 It’s ironic. This is the very question about which our men called sex addicts have no concerns and never ask as they overtly and covertly abuse us (and sometimes our children, too). The core values that would give this question voice are not values that hold their lives together and interpret what their lives mean.

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making decisions, self-careDiane Stricklanddoing the right thing, the right thing for you, core values, partner integrity, tell your story, partners look after themselves, telling the truth about him, telling the truth of your life, overcoming fear of truth
To Have and To Hold, How the Sex Addiction Treatment Industry Uses Wives and Partners

When I asked Tania Rochelle to take this blog, neither of us could foresee the week’s events and the toll they would take on so many women. Today Tania opens her life to us, sharing what she lived through and her choice to honor her truth and save her life. Thank you, Tania.

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therapeutic abuse, expectations for recovery, self-care, Post-traumatic stressDiane Stricklandtherapeutic incompetence, trauma symptoms, telling the truth about him, telling the truth of your life, misogynist therapy, tell your story