The Learning Curve
A few readers have brought it to my attention that they don’t know how to avoid treatment practitioners who may not be safe for them.
Even though I’m writing about that regularly, it is still a learning curve.
I’ve been studying this industry for over a decade now and can affirm that it takes a fair bit of commitment, skill, and wisdom to stay on top of the treatment industry’s various re-inventions of itself, new product lines of “training”, the theories underneath talking points, and the new kids on the block.
I have shared my work with you so you could educate yourselves. By doing that you will better understand the kind of treatment being offered, the kind of funding underneath it, and the point of view it uses to understand and treat you. Who and what you choose is up to you.
In my free blogs I cover, among other things, the treatment industry’s flaccid leadership and support for wives and partners in the pandemic, its new product line of divorce support, the reality of trying to have covert abuse dealt with, the dangers of couple’s counselling, a list of treatment industry problems for partners, the codependency roots of focussing on betrayal trauma and treating it, the move from talking about trauma to trauma-like, the neglect of family abuse impact in treatment, what kind of primary relationship the industry has in mind, the boundary bullshit (worth two blogs), cowardice in practitioners, how wives and partners are used, and how therapists use tone-policing to shut you up. I do all that and much more.
Go to the list of blog titles available to you for free on the blog archive page and starting reading, or re-reading. Here’s the link to that page: https://www.yourstoryissafehere.com/blog-archive
Do your homework with all my blog entries and you will be able to read websites with the right questions in hand. But there’s no short cut. I’ve done my part. I’ve demonstrated your life is worth this work. It’s your turn, now. This part of the work is yours to do.
And yes, some women realize it’s just safer and less work to talk with me. And remember, just because another practitioner praises my blog, don’t imagine that’s because they understand it, agree with it, and work in sync with it. Sometimes they just recognize that it’s powerful and associate themselves with it in order lock in a client with my truths, insights and analysis—okay it’s really about the client’s money at that point, isn’t it?
But this work isn’t a parlour game to me. And it’s not an industry. It’s vocational. Big difference.
I respect the messages sent to me by wives and partners, whether they are my clients, or not. Most of the time writers express their thanks for a blog, or describe the impact my blogs have had over time. These are so encouraging since I offer them without charge to readers and it’s good to know they are having positive impact. I have wanted the blogs to travel as far and wide as possible so that women all over the world will know that someone truly understands their experience and can articulate why so much felt so wrong with current treatment options. And that has happened.
So, I want to say thank you to everyone who has responded to my investment in their lives by investing in mine however they have been able to do so. Yes, occasionally readers have surprising expectations that I can’t or won’t serve. I appreciate that those who don’t respect my first nudge that further conversation would require a trial session, are few and far between. Needing help can be the worst part of this whole experience for women who are usually self-sufficient. But the vast majority of the women who write me are respectful and courteous, even in their profound need. Such strength is humbling and inspiring. Your one-line “thank you’s” are like refiner’s gold. I can feel the heat of the fire out of which they come. Thank you so much. It is an honour to know you are reading my blog and to support you as may be possible even when you aren’t my client. You make my work holy. I never forget that. And I believe in you.
If you still aren’t sure how to choose a safe practitioner, book a trial session with me and see how it goes.
With you…for quite a while now,
Diane.
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